This saturday, i am home - - to do studying. preparing for my upcoming exams which will be here I think pretty soon, 12th and 15th of April. I didnt really want last minute rushing anymore so ya. .

I think gradually im being moved by life unknowingly, unwillingy, I was and did. This loss, is still very recent, still very unwilling. still very idontknow, I never wanted him to leave:(

Everytime I thought I was coping well, (at least for the moment) then I dont know why I would suddenly stopped and remind myself about the loss. It came naturally. haix.. This saturday sweetheart, i wish you were here with me just lying around, and ya, maybe bring you down to play, I dont know its just perfect-- Actually to feel better I always imagine. I imagine youre still here, at my door room, lying down and peeping underneath, I imagine you following behind Oldgranny everytime she stands up, I imagine hugging you Sweetheart. How I really Wish i could have you once again, all over again. Sigh...